The major problem here is that many people are unaware of the family pattern. They must have been going through a lot in their life journey; they might have been facing challenge upon challenge, problem upon problem, including ill health, financial difficulties, hard times, and constant hardships. All they know is that things are so hard for them, and life has not been fair to them. But they never make time to ask questions and understand why all these are happening.
It is only when they ask these questions that they come to understand there is something called a family pattern, which is why they keep experiencing hard times in life.
What Family Patterns Really Are and Why They Matter
Now, what is a family pattern? It is an inherent part of a family’s culture and tradition, especially when it comes to how things work out for them. Now, let’s get it straight, it could be positive or negative. A family could have a negative pattern or a positive pattern. But my point, exactly, is that in every family, there is always a pattern that can trend upward or downward.
To understand and identify family patterns just as they are, you must be very honest with yourself and avoid any pretense or cover-ups. And this, as a matter of fact, is the number one factor you have to consider to gain the true eye-opening knowledge about what your own family patterns are all about.
I say this because a lot of people are never comfortable telling themselves the truth, let alone facing it just as it is. They keep lying to themselves till that ugly pattern gets into the next generation and continues just like that. And guess what, it keeps degenerating and keeps getting worse as it’s been allowed to find its way into the next generation.
You are being self-deceitful if you are doubting family patterns
The obvious truth is that family patterns matter a lot because you can never hide from your shadow; this one is not all about saying “God Forbid. It will never be my portion” and so on. Believe me, this is not a matter of God forbidding at all; if your spiritual director can be so honest with you, he will also tell you the same.
You will not expect God to come down and still do for you that which he has given you the power and authority to do for yourself. So, it is your duty to identify, acknowledge, and fix your negative family pattern.
Another example I will use to describe the family pattern for you is this: please consider the muddy, slippery path that leads to your farmland. Just imagine how very muddy and slippery the ground upon which you walk while heading to your farm is, especially during the rainy season, which is also the farming season.
Now, have you noticed that as you are walking through that muddy and slippery road that leads to your farm, you will definitely put your legs on that ground and pack all the mud on your feet. And this will happen regardless of how you try to avoid putting your leg on it. You must surely put your legs on it before you get to your farm. Now that is a clear example of what a family pattern looks like. You are bound to partake in it as long as you are a biological member of that family.
How Patterns Begin Inside the Home
In every home, there is always the father, the mother, and the children. There are also the grannies and other extended family members like the aunties and the uncles. The cousins, the nieces and the nephews. All these are the people that make up every nuclear and extended family.
We also have the great-grandparents who, in most cases, have gone back to their maker and been laid to Rest, either recently or long ago. So, in most cases, they are the ones who created and developed these patterns. If they had worked so hard in their own time to see to the progress and success of their family, both for the present and future generations, then their sacrifices and hard work will continue to lead the family through and pave the way for the younger and even the children of the family yet unborn.
But if they did not, if all they did was to leave some reckless and lavish life, without considering what could be the effect of the life they are living in the days of their great-grandchildren, that is where the negative family pattern begins.
The truth is that most of our ancestors in the family did a lot of terrible things during their time on earth, and most times, all the evil and bad things they did… all the crimes they committed will still come back to haunt their future generations even when they are no more in the land of the living.
Some of them were so evil in one way or another, bringing curses upon curses upon the entire family lineage because of the reckless lives they lived in their days. And they leave their future generation to continue suffering the consequences of their actions and inactions.
The Signs a Family Pattern Is Repeating in Your Life
From all I have explained, I believe it’s clear to you now. I believe you must have understood how these patterns work and what brings them about, especially the negative pattern we are talking about. So, the signs that a Family Pattern is Repeating in Your Life are very distinct if you have read this article this far. Even if you have not started seeing the signs now, it is just a matter of time; things will begin to unfold.
All you should understand is that if they had committed a lot of atrocities, which they did not look for a way to settle before leaving the earth, this means that, as a result of the consequences, this family will be conditioned into a certain pattern, which could take the form of hardship and long-term suffering. It could result in a chronic disease that the family would be known for, from one generation to the next.
Sometimes it could come in the form of abject poverty, which will make it so difficult for any child of that family to succeed and become rich like their peers. I’m talking about that type of hardship that no matter how hard you work and no matter how much effort you put in, it will look like you are not doing anything. Sometimes it could also result in untimely death and many more problems.
Why These Patterns Often Feel Normal at First
Yes, it will feel normal at first, especially for the family’s children, because they see it as the norm. They would believe that things are difficult and it is not their parents’ fault. They would see it as just the way life is… and this pattern will continue to grow in their minds until they reach a certain stage in life when they can begin to ask questions to understand why they are going in that direction.
The truth is that a lot of them will still never ask questions and will never understand it all because it will continue to feel and look normal to them.
This pattern will continue to feel normal to almost all family members until, one day, the chosen one in the family starts to raise their head. They usually start showing these signs of being the chosen one from when they were still very little, but in most cases, nobody in the entire household will understand them…
They talk differently, act differently, and most of the time they show behaviour that makes them seem like rebels or even black sheep of the family, because they would hardly agree with other members of the household.
What Changes the Moment You Finally See the Pattern Clearly
Your mindset changes. There is going to be a shift in the way you see life and everything happening around you. Like I said earlier, almost all your family members will start disagreeing with you on almost everything.
You did not just see the pattern clearly for its own sake; you see it clearly because you are the one who is actually choosing to change and rewrite that family’s story. And trust me when I tell you that it’s not going to be easy for you at all. We shall discuss that further in the next blog post.
Summary
Every family has their own unique pattern, which could be positive or negative. The problem here is that most families going through real tough times are reluctant to ask questions that will help them understand why life is treating them so hard. This hardship condition can be so bad that a lady who is coming from a poor background is still likely to carry that bad family pattern to the family where she is married and then pollute that lineage with poverty.
