First, stop seeking and start embodying, because you don’t attract what you want; you attract who you are. It’s a quote by Wayne Dyer, and I love that quote because you don’t attract what you want in life; you only attract who you are, what you embody, which is what you’re made up of: the energy, the attitude, the thinking that you have, which is a reflection of what you attract in your life.
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Stop searching for what you think you’re missing. And start becoming someone who already has it. So instead of chasing love or a relationship, or chasing money or something external, we need to start embodying the feelings of already having them.
So what does this mean? How do I associate the feelings of already having a beautiful relationship, a partner who cares about me, a partner that speaks positivity into me, that supports my dreams, that supports me in becoming a greater version of myself, that supports me in staying healthy and doing healthy activities towards me and dives into my love language so I feel loved, seen and validated?
What does it mean to embody the feelings associated with already having something like that? What does it mean to embody the feelings of creating a wealthy life, of having more financial. Opportunities from people with money wanting to come hang out with me, surround themselves with me, teach me, mentor me, coach me for free, and start creating opportunities for financial abundance in my life.
What does this mean to really embody the feelings associated with already having them? For example, feel grateful and appreciative, as if you’re already in a loving relationship or already in a place of financial peace and freedom. You can do this by visualising your life from the destination, not toward it.
Because a lot of times we’re searching, we’re seeking, and we’re striving for something from a destination place. And we’re like, when I create this thing, when I have the relationship, then I’ll feel loved, then I’ll feel Worthy. Then I’ll feel enough. Then I’ll feel ready to chase my dreams, ready to take on the next step, ready to step into this greater version of me when I have the relationship or when I have more money; then I can go do the things that I want to do and start to feel like I’m worthy of more.
A lot of times we are not visualising our life from the destination, and that’s what we need to be doing. Not once I get here, then I’ll feel good about me. And this isn’t crazy or delusional. It’s aligning what you want with the energy that attracts it.
So let me say it again: This is about aligning what you want with the energy that attracts that thing. For many years, I chased the feeling of a relationship to feel better about myself. I was chasing building my business. To feel lovable and enough in life, and to have people see me and validate me.
So I wanted to accomplish. I wanted to build a following out of this wound, or out of the need or desire to feel a lack. And I accomplished those things. I was able to get into relationships. I was able to build my business and make lots of money.
But something consistently felt off, and it was because I was creating from a lack. I was creating from a wounded place. A needy place, like, OK, now I have this thing, I have this relationship, and my business is growing. Now I can start to feel better. But the feeling of being better never came. It didn’t come until I started shifting my mindset.
The feeling of being better when I had the thing didn’t actually happen. It actually made me feel more insecure, more scarce, more in lack, because I felt like, “Oh, I don’t feel what I thought I would feel with this relationship, with this money.” Something’s wrong with me, so I’ll go make more money; I’ll go get more followers to try to fill this lack inside me. I did that for a long time in my 20s and 30s, and it took me a while to break the pattern holding me back.
